NAKED BATH SALT ZOMBIES FINALLY REACH RICHLAND COUNTY
RICHLAND CO.—Only in Richland.
We were awash in reports of a bizarre occurrence that happened Saturday out on U.S. 50 in east Richland County between Saturday and today. Only when my aunt in Louisiana sent the vague little coverage the Olney Daily Mail (a GateHouse publication; remember, they don’t love you, we do) gave it did we decide we were thoroughly confused and needed to call Sheriff Andy Hires to clarify it; here’s the ODM’s sort-of coverage:
The county dispatch center received multiple calls shortly before noon Saturday concerning a female who was unclothed, bending over, and yelling “Look at me!” while running down East U.S. 50 in the area of County Road 1900 East.
Sheriff Andrew Hires said there are no charges pending against the 36-year-old Linton, Ind. woman, who he said was traveling in a van with others when they stopped and forced her out of the vehicle.
Hires said the woman later admitted that she was under the influence of bath salts.
One of those who called 911 stated that the woman appeared to be intoxicated or on drugs.
Another call stated the woman was in the middle of the road, trying to stop traffic.
Hires said she was also reportedly banging on the van shortly after she was forced from the vehicle.
Authorities identified the female and an ambulance responded.
Um. Yeah. So, who was she? And where are the rest of em? And, WTH?
Well here’s what Andy told Ang.
The woman is Tara Helrigel, white female, 36, currently from Linton, but not originally; authorities there say she’s from a county further north in Indiana. Right now (10.02.12), she’s sitting in the hospital in Olney, having ingested bath salts by her own admission on Saturday. She told authorities that when she went crazy on bath salts, the people she was with in a van, traveling on U.S. 50, stopped and told her to get out. They just left her there. Apparently she’s been unable to tell authorities who they were or what they were doing, but Hires did say she’d “never been in Richland County before in her life; they were just passing through.”
When she was dumped out on the highway Saturday, she did what most bath salts zombies do: because they usually get hot (temperature-wise), they shuck their clothing, and then they act crazy. She was bending over and showing passersby out on 50 everything she had. I guess we’re all fortunate they were in their vehicles, and no one’s face was consumed.
Hires said there have been no charges filed. She could’ve been arrested for disorderly conduct, but there has to be a complaint, or there’s no basis for a charge. Or she could’ve been cited for public intoxication, but there aren’t a lot of standardized tests for the different varieties of bath salts, so that kind of rules that out. No one knows who the people in the van were or where they are, and of course, they’re not speaking up, probably considering dumping Tara good riddance to bad rubbish. So here we are, the taxpayers of Richland, paying for this idiot to strip naked on the highway due to consumption of an intoxicating compound. To me, it would seem easier to have let her get nekkid in the van and keep driving on 50 until they reached Indiana.
Here also we see the problem with mainstream media. Why not ask—and get answers to—the obvious questions? They won’t. They rarely do. Which is why GateHouse is plummeting, and independent media—REAL media—is thriving.
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